Masala macaroni turns plain into something extraordinary | London Free Press
Sunday, July 30, 2023
Thursday, July 27, 2023
Sinéad O'Connor
Sinéad.
If I were a different kind of person I would let it settle and wait a few days to collect my thoughts and do this the right and grown-up way but I think she’d be more proud of me for writing like this….pulled off to the side of the highway writing from my fucking heart because that’s she did, all her life, made from the heart.
I got my first Sinéad record at age 14 - I Do Not Want What I Have Not Got - dubbed from my mentor Anthony’s CD collection onto a 90-minute Maxell XLII blank cassette tape. It changed my life. I wanted the artwork, so I borrowed Anthony’s CD booklet, took it down to the town library xerox machine, copied it, and carefully and lovingly cut it to size for a cassette tape. So I could see her face.
Her face.
I learned every song by heart.
She was fierceness and honestly incarnate.
She howled her heart out so purely that people had no idea what to make of it.
This is a woman who ripped up a picture of the pope on Saturday Night Live (when it had no ”safety delay”) to draw attention to the sex abuse happening in the Catholic Church, after delivering “War” by Bob Marley, a cappella:
Until the philosophy which hold one race
Superior and another Inferior
Is finally
And permanently
Discredited
And abandoned
Everywhere is war.
Twelve days later she took the stage at Madison Square Garden for a Bob Dylan tribute festival and you could barely hear her sing over the boos and jeers from the crowd. She scrapped her planned Dylan song and screamed out “War” again, as the crowd tried to overpower her.
That feeling. Many women have been there. I have been there too, shaking, as it feels like the whole world is trying to shout and drown you out, and put you in your place. Wondering if I am the crazy one. Wondering if this many people are right. Or wrong. Or even real.
She was right about the church. She was very fucking right.
She was right about so many things.
Now that she is dead, I know she’ll be lauded and applauded.
But back then? That night? How do you imagine she felt that night, crawling into bed, having been abused by a crowd of thousands? How would you feel? What would that do to you? Would you care if the world turned around, forty years later, and said: “Sorry about that, you were actually very brave?”
This is a woman who boycotted the Grammys saying she did not want “to be part of a world that measures artistic ability by material success.” This is a woman who refused to play US national anthem before certain concerts. That went down reallll well, too.
She was hated, she was scorned, she was cancelled for being honest over and over again. That SNL move was the beginning of the end of a career in many ways. She never recovered.
Too much, they said. Go away.
She used her voice. She kept on speaking.
She was loud. Being a loud woman is not fucking convenient, for anyone. Ever. Not around here.
She was strikingly beautiful. She shaved her head and gave the middle finger to the beauty standard. She wore combat boots and jeans. She opened her mouth to the max, literally. She did not mumble; she roared. She inspired me into taking power; she inspired so many of my friends. She showed us all another way. There’s this way, too. Go this way, she seemed to be screaming, GO.
Dismissed as crazy. She struggled, and she struggled, and she struggled. She was punished, she was mocked, she was ridiculed.
She retreated and came back time and time again, her roar ragged, her frustration jagged and visible. Painful. You could see it, feel it. We mourned it, me and my friends.
Sinéad? Misunderstood? Which chicken, which egg?
What the world did to Sinéad was death by a thousand cuts. The world lauded her, worshipped her, bought her, sold her, forgave her, claimed her, disavowed her. Over and over in cycles. How could anyone survive that? Like a piece of metal getting bent over and over and over again. It breaks.
She began as a fragile person. A fragile artist. Which is why her songs were so beautiful and powerful to begin with. A raw heart. A mother. Not an idea, not a theoretical. A person.
The world loved the taste of her. The world didn’t know how to digest her. The world spit her out.
She never apologized for ripping up that picture of the pope. When asked later, she said “I’m not sorry I did it. It was brilliant”.
It was.
She was.
Never forget this woman.
Let her memory guide us.
Let them scream at you, but do not stop singing.
Never apologize just to make them happy, to make them go away, to “get along”, to make them accept you.
No, no, no.
Me say War.
Sinéad….rest in world-changing ripped paper phoenix-pieces from the stage, rising and burning into the white night stars. Find peace at last. I hope you forgive us what we could not give you.
Tuesday, July 25, 2023
Shadow Self 101
https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/shadow-self?fbclid=IwAR1oVPtded4uEZEEK_g6Yt-Pv-_ecU1PQLplKyizJ8esm7_0OledEf1UUac
The Ultimate List of Resources for Shadow Work
The Ultimate List of Resources for Shadow Work
Here are some amazing resources that can help you when trying to explore your shadow self:
Robert Augustus Masters - Bringing Your Shadow Out of the Dark: This book provides a direct, very comprehensive look at shadow (in personal and collective contexts) as well as the tools needed to explore and effectively work with it. In this book you will find:
- The nature of our shadow and how to optimally work with it—exploring our conditioning and core shadow elements, including in the domains of shame, fear, aggression, resistance, addiction, death, and spirituality
- How to work with the child within, self-sabotage, narcissism, sexuality, dreams, and other matters deeply influenced by our shadow
- Why turning toward our pain is an essential part of shadow work—making wise use of our pain
- Collective shadow domains we share with family, social groups, political party, or nation—bringing them and their associated traumas into the light
Christine Jette - Tarot Shadow Work: Through Tarot work, journalling meditation, creative visualization, and dream work, you can free yourself from the shackles of the unbridled, unconscious power of your shadow self. This book is ideal for those who are in recovery from a serious addiction or illness, as well as any person seeking a deeper understanding of his or her true self.
Mastin Kipp - Claim Your Power: Mastin Kipp as he guides you on a 40-day journey, inspired by Joseph Campbell’s model of the hero’s journey, to identify and dissolve whatever’s holding you back, break free from trauma and victimhood, and transform your life. Not only will you change your life for the better, but in doing so, you’ll improve the lives of the people you love. With Claim Your Power, you’ll wake up energized by the momentum you’ve unleashed, an energy that will only increase with each new accomplishment and breakthrough.
Alyce Barry - Practically Shameless: How Shadow Work Helped Me Find My Voice, My Path, and My Inner Gold: Practically Shameless reveals for the first time that our resistance is a good guy, not a bad guy, in our inner drama. It demonstrates the surprising key to turning resistance into a forwarding movement: befriending that resistance by honoring the role it's been playing in protecting us. Once honored, our resistance becomes willing to stand down and take on, with its treasury of information on risks we've faced in the past, a new role as a valued ally as we begin to move forward.
Connie Zweig - Romancing the Shadow: As therapists Connie Zweig and Steve Wolf show in this landmark book, the shadow can actually be a source of emotional richness and vitality, and acknowledging it can be a pathway to healing and authentic life.
James Hollis - Why Good People Do Bad Things: In addition to its presence in our personal lives, Hollis looks at the larger picture of the Shadow at work in our culture—from organized religion to the suffering and injustice that abounds in our modern world. Accepting and examining the Shadow as part of one’s self, Hollis suggests, is the first step toward wholeness. Revealing a new way of understanding our darker selves, Hollis offers wisdom to help you to acquire more conscious conduct of your life and bring a new level of awareness to your daily actions and choices.
Debbie Ford - The Dark Side of the Light Chasers: Reclaiming Your Power, Creativity, Brilliance, and Dreams: Rather than reject the seemingly undesirable parts of ourselves, Ford offers advice on how to confront our shadows. Only by owning every aspect of yourself can you achieve harmony and "let your own light shine," she explains. "The purpose of doing shadow work is to become whole. To end our suffering. To stop hiding ourselves from ourselves. Once we do this we can stop hiding ourselves from the rest of the world."
Journal Prompts: There are so many benefits to journaling, especially for your mental wellness. If you deal with stress, anxiety, depression, or even if you’re just feeling a bit overwhelmed, journaling can really help.
Marie-Louise von Franz - Shadow and Evil in Fairy Tales: Dr. von Franz concludes that every rule of behavior that we can learn from the unconscious through fairy tales and dreams is usually a paradox: sometimes there must be a physical struggle against evil and sometimes a contest of wits, sometimes a display of strength or magic and sometimes a retreat. Above all, she shows the importance of relying on the central, authentic core of our being--the innermost Self, which is beyond the struggle between the opposites of good and evil.
Other useful links:
Shadow Work Journaling
Shadow Work Journaling
"When you find out that there was never anything in the dark side to be afraid of... Nothing is left but to love." - Alan Watts
In adulthood, many people experience a growing desire for greater self-awareness and authenticity as well as a closer connection with others, both of which can be attained through shadow work. We suggest that this desire for awakening is a normal stage of adult development, one that has been described in the literature on the transpersonal and spiritual. Unlike the transition from adolescence to adulthood, which occurs biologically and thus automatically, the transition to greater consciousness must be intentionally chosen and then enacted. As Jung notes, "This process of coming to terms with the Other in us is well worthwhile, because in this way we get to know aspects of our nature which we would not allow anybody else to show us and which we would never have admitted."
A shadowless person is either superficially naive and shallow or profoundly immature and unconscious, it seems. Therefore, as stated by Jung, our aim is wholeness rather than goodness. As a result, our shadow work is an invocation to us, a calling forth, and it contains the seed of our potential wholeness. Each of us must exercise self-control, adopt a positive attitude, and be consistently intentional in our approach to shadow work. And none of us can avoid the discipline this work will require; it will require more rigor than technique. Shadow work can take many different forms, such as writing, mindfulness practice, meditation, or really any activity that makes you more aware of your triggers and passions.
WHY YOU SHOULD CONSIDER JOURNALING?
The purpose of shadow work is to bring the shadow self into conscious awareness. Shadow working journaling is one of the best ways to accomplish this. We have the ability to access the mind and reveal different facets of the shadow that you might be unaware of. Writing down your ideas and feelings can help you shift your perspective and see the situation from a different angle. Your shadow work journal may also serve as a mirror in which you explore your deepest feelings.
You can access your subconscious by using prompts to record your thoughts and feelings. Aside from making the process a little simpler, choosing one journal prompt at a time also makes it much less overwhelming and simpler to process. These questions are intended to push you to your limits and illuminate the darkest corners of your mind. Allow your thoughts and feelings to flow onto the pages of your journal as you write your responses to the prompts.
HOW OFTEN SHOULD YOU JOURNAL?
This journal is highly personal, and nobody else ever needs to see it. You can be as honest and open as you possibly can in your journal. Make sure to move slowly when you're focused on journaling your shadow work. It is not necessary to devote hours to shadow work journaling. A few minutes each day can make a difference. The easiest way to write something down is to simply open a blank document or notebook and begin. You shouldn't give it too much thought.
GOOD PROMPTS TO GET STARTED WITH JOURNALING
If you're new to journaling and shadow work, I've listed some of the best shadow work prompts below that you can use. Some of these questions may be triggering, so be patient with yourself.
- Do you allow your potential to become actual?
- How naive or trusting are you?
- When was the last time you felt content?
- When are you hardest on yourself? Why?
- What triggers you? Can you identify where this came from?
- Make a list of the traits you consider to be the “worst” and "best" traits a person can have.
- Do you get along with your family? Why or why not?
- What are your toxic characteristics? How do they manifest themselves? How do you transfer these to others?
- How often do you forgive yourself?
- Who has caused you the most hurt in your life?
POST SCRIPTUM
Shadow work constantly tests the ego, overthrows it, humbles it, and occasionally even kills it. Jungian psychoanalyst Dr. James Hollis says when we do this work, we do it for more than ourselves. When we do this work, we find, in the end, that the light is in the darkness itself.
The Benefits of Shadow Work
The Benefits of Shadow Work
“Everyone carries a shadow, and the less it is embodied in the individual’s conscious life, the blacker and denser it is. At all counts, it forms an unconscious snag, thwarting our most well-meant intentions.” – Carl Jung
The goal of shadow work is to reveal repressed feelings so that you can better understand who you are and how you interact with others. You'll learn to trust yourself more as you become more self-aware. And you can apply that insight to your personal life as well. It can be quite difficult to look at your shadow side. The amount of effort required to continually push these aspects of yourself into the shadows is hard on your mental health. Addressing your triggers, issues, and other obstacles may be liberating.
Scott Jeffrey asks: Who likes to own their imperfections, weaknesses, selfishness, nasty tendencies, hatred, etc.? And he adds that it is more pleasurable and affirming to concentrate on our strengths. If they are actual flaws, bringing them to light will allow you to address them more effectively. Our shadow is most dangerous when we are unaware of it. Although these negative impulses may indeed be existent in the shadow self, according to Jung, it might also contain positive impulses. Your shadow doesn't simply cover up qualities that others might find unpleasant. It can also hide awesome aspects of you, like your creativity. Embracing your creative side comes from accepting your shadow. You may fully tap into all of the various expressions that it hides rather than repressing your darker nature. Jung argued that a person's view of the external world and their interactions rely on their shadow self. He also argued that by engaging with one's shadow self, a person could better understand oneself and reach a sense of unity.
So much has been kept hidden, including judgment, shame, anxieties, outdated beliefs, etc. As a result of addressing and bringing these to light, other aspects of yourself may emerge. You'll have a clearer lens through which to perceive the world if you accept everyone as they are, including yourself. A nuanced understanding combined with a clear vision leads to better empathy for others. Instead of condemning bad behavior, you understand why individuals behave the way they do because you recognize that potential inside yourself, as opposed to clinging to ideas of moral superiority or righteousness. It won't always come naturally and without effort. But getting started with shadow work gives you the opportunity to get there.
Trauma passed down from your parents, generation, or ancestors can cause unexpected negative behaviors in you. You may still be carrying the trauma of growing up poor, living through war or being forced to move. You can peel off these layers and regain your genuine self with the use of shadow work. It can assist you in overcoming the multiple challenges life throws your way. These shadows are actually a gift from the universe to you, revealing to you the parts of yourself that require care and repair in order for you to live a happy and fulfilled existence. It can help you become more aware of your projections and judgments.
Shadow work allows you to master your emotions. The gradual process of achieving complete emotional control is known as emotional mastery. You may restore control of both your bodily and mental state with its guidance. So, no longer getting caught up in the past or bringing it into the present. Recognizing the memory feedback loop, allowing you to break free and become an objective observer. You are much more in touch with your genuine self now, so there is no need for uncertainty, second-guessing, or losing your power to others. Manifesting becomes simpler and more sustainable when you become your own star.
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